Thursday, August 21, 2008

A Bubble within a Bubble

Yeah yeah.. I deleted my latest post for pure meanness. Sue me.



I suppose I am really on edge trying to figure out what has gone wrong. Jake has lately had so many really great days, and the past two he has been stimming like crazy, carrying around his precious stopsign (that had been lost in the box for what seemed like forever), babbling nonsense and using almost no sensible language, running back and forth with his eyes rolled back in his head, and breaking down several times per day into a screaming heap.

Is this roller coaster just a part of "normal" 3 year old behavior? Is there a trigger in his diet or environment? Is it because I'm being harder on him.. asking him to pick up after himself and giving him lots of directions and jobs? What is up with these HUGE ups and HUGE downs?

Sometimes he seems to have these lows just before he jumps forward in his development, but then sometimes there are lows for no reason that I can understand. Then I read horror stories of children "regressing" and never coming back.

Mostly I feel like I'm the only person in the whole wide world that sees these things and worries about him. It makes me feel like I'm insane. Am I making things worse? Am I making things better? Am I cut out for this job? Trying to get inside his head sometimes takes me back to the time in my childhood when I felt like I was alone in a bubble. Now I'm in my bubble with a little sidekick thats in his own bubble.

And occasionally I catch some sleep in between the worrying.